Jealousy: a sign of love or not a healthy relationship

“He is jealous – it means he loves”, says the people’s wisdom. But where is the border that separates the manifestation of love and the abnormal dependence of a person on relationships? To understand this, you need to understand the causes that cause jealousy in people. 

In addition to real reasons (treason, deceit), psychologists distinguish several other factors that can cause this destructive feeling in a person. First, the distrust of the jealous in himself and his underestimated self-esteem can engender distrust of the second half. Typically, these people say to themselves: “I’m an ordinary guy, and she’s beautiful. Of course, she changes me “or” I’m an ordinary waitress, and he’s the director of the company. He is constantly surrounded by beautiful women. And this new secretary with two feet legs will certainly do everything possible to get my man. ” As a result, any delay of a loved one at work, any SMS or changes in appearance are perceived by the partner as a signal, a clear sign of treason.

Secondly, the cause for jealousy can serve as the own “sins” of man. When for one change is something natural, he is inclined to suspect others of similar behavior. At the same time, the jealous does not even think that there are honest relations in the world built on trust and loyalty.
How does jealousy affect relationships?
Manifestation of jealousy within reasonable limits can help a couple to restore relations to the previous fire of passion and to show their feelings to each other. After all, people who are absolutely confident in themselves, the number of which is minimal, or those who have long been indifferent to their second half are not jealous.
If jealousy has no basis for any reason, and its demonstration is of a regular nature, it can completely destroy the family alliance. Constant quarrels, suspicions over time make a life together unbearable. As a result, sooner or later one of the partners either decides to divorce, or to avoid unreasonable reproaches, is decided on real betrayal.
In addition, if the couple managed to have a child, before starting a new scandal, you need to think about how this can affect the child’s psyche. When a child grows up in stress and constantly hears the abuse of his parents, this can lead to a neurotic reaction – aggression, hysterics, self-closure. Depending on the degree of psychological trauma received, the consequences can be manifested for a long time.

What to do?
If you notice symptoms of unhealthy jealousy in yourself or your loved one, do not rush to put an end to the relationship. In such cases, psychologists advise you to find the root of the problems, identify weaknesses and start working on yourself. However, if the situation has gone too far, it will not be easy to sort out with her personally. In this case, it is best to contact a specialist who will find the right solution and return harmony to the family.